They have bad hair. Skewed bone structure. Grotesquely pointy elbows. Yellow eyes. One of them had the little wisp of a mustache that hung over his lip like extra mayo he would never wipe off.
This week everyone is debating the all-time greatest Lakers and Celtics. But why don’t we give the venerable Boston organization the credit it deserves: No team in history has assembled more gnarled or pinched faces and jagged or malproportioned bodies than the Celtics.
Was it a drafting strategy or plain luck? No matter, the mugliness is unparalleled.
It’s really, really tough to pick the top ug-mo. Do you go with the mulleted Larry Bird, Norman-Batesish Fred Roberts, the pasty Red Auerbach, the doughy Tommy Heinsohn, or the bulbous Sam Cassell?
Or is it too hard to pick just one?
Here are our choices for the “top” eight.
Below you can cast your vote for ugliest Celtic of all time.
(Note: The late Dennis Johnson purposely did not appear on this list. May he rest in peace.)
I voted for Fred Roberts. But who is left out? There must be more ugly Celtics.